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Cledus T. Judd
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1/2
Hey, everybody welcome out tonight Hope you're having a good time out there Don't forget about your waitresses and a coming up next We got Sheena on the main stage
Athena on the disco and don't forget we got Those recliner dancers in the back Stick around and get those dollar bills out guys And tip tip tip
Take it off, baby
Well, here's how this whole mess got started Had a stripper at a bachelor party I knew when she jumped out of that cake We were meant to be
The next date we both flew off to Vegas I must have been an ignoramus I honestly believed that she Loved me just for me
Oh, wasn't six months later it came to an end I walked out of the courtroom crying She left with a grin
'Cause she got half and I said, 'Ow' I mean dang that comes to nearly Fifty thou per date My butt had never been so chafed 'Cause she got half
Find more lyrics at ※ Mojim.com I wondered if I'd remain lonely Or would I find my one and only Then the answer to my prayers Appeared on my TV (Call me now)
The cutest little tarot card reader I knew that I just had to meet her Then she said it was in the cards For her to marry me
Oh, wasn't three months later I was in court again No way she could have predicted The way that it would end
'Cause I got half and she said, 'Ow' Two dollars a minute, so everyone call right now Your future awaits and I will be the next Bill Gates 'Cause I get half
Sometimes you're better off as friends 'Cause if it ever ends then they get half And you'll say, 'Ow' So I'm not looking to get married right now
I've got a date With a beautiful Playboy Playmate Who won't get half No, she won't get half
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